Stepping toward Him

Brothers and Sisters-

This Journey has brought me to this moment. It is my purpose here to share some of my Journey with you. I believe the Lord is preparing me for some purpose that He has in mind. It has been a long lesson, mostly because I have been an uncooperative student, a slow slow learner. I have, like the proverbial sheep, gone my own way. That particular headstrong willingness to walk off cliffs while insisting that I am right has led to many wounds. Yet, Christ, ever faithful has healed them all. Will I ever learn? Possibly. Will I ultimately do His bidding? Matthew 21:28-30. Yeah, I will. But He knows how I am. Maybe I didn't trust.

People will disappoint you. Infrequently, they will surprise you by not disappointing you. Through it all there is one, and only one who can be counted on always. He's always waiting, always faithful. Why did He hang around waiting for me to turn my attention back to Him - so many times? If Jesus wasn't God I would accuse Him of being divine on the basis of His faithfulness, alone. It's unreal, bigger than what a mortal is capable of. In my first marriage I was unfaithful. In my second marriage though I was physically faithful, my mind and heart wandered, wishing for more fulfillment, wishing even that my partner would magically transform into the unspoiled and hopeful person I stood beside at our wedding. Instead, my spouse remained changed, and ultimately, too distant for me to tolerate. To say we went in different directions would be understated.

Where am I heading now? What does He want me to do? How gracious He is. How wonderful to think He still has a purpose for jaded losers like me. I'll just keep walking forward. I'll try trusting Him this time. I'll walk toward the light on this journey. After all, He's the most interesting person in this or any other world. I have been disappointed in so many things in this life. I'm willing to try it Your way now, Lord. Show me Your mercy.